Saints Row 2 DLC

I’ve been concentrating on beating the first Final Fantasy lately, but after missing a whole week of it, I wanted to get another game review fast. I completed Saints Row 2 a few months ago, and it broke my top ten favorite games list, even though I’m not fond of Grand Theft Auto. So I decided to download and play the two DLC packs. And I must say... they weren’t worth the price. Especially after I got the real game with the first one for just $20, I technically spent more on this than the actual game.

The two packs are Corporate Warfare and Ultor Exposed. In total, they took me three hours. Both contain three missions, and are over way too quick.

Corporate Warfare was the one I really wanted to play, because it explains what happened to Dex, and considering he tries to kill you and Julius in the main game, I really wanted some closure. But we get none. After the second mission, he skips town, and you spend the third mission sniping this friends to lure him back, except when it’s over that’s it. No fourth mission, Dex just gets away. And I here he never comes back in the sequels, so... what’s the point?”

I should point out that half the second mission is the Heli Assault Activity, the most annoying activity in the main game.

Ultor Exposed you know from the start is pointless, because Ultor is the same company from the Red Faction series, which takes place in the future. You’re doomed to fail, making the whole thing another waste. And man, the boss battle with the helicopters was annoying. Still, I prefer this one more, because it’s more of the driving and shooting that makes the original game fun.

Bottom line: Good, but not worth the price.

Rating: 6/10

Sonic Select: Book Eight

I hate adding anything new to the backlogs, but the Archie Sonic comic is something I’m trying to catch up on. Unfortunately, Archie isn’t making it easy. It’s re-releasing the main series in order, the Knuckles series too late, and the mini-series and special issues all over the place. This set contains comics that the Archives are both forty issues behind and seventy issues ahead. It’s the whole Tails sage.

The first story, Submersible Rehearsal, is originally from the Sonic Triple Trouble special, which was already reprinted in Select Book One. The plot is pretty basic, setting up Tails’ main conflict. Rotor builds the Sea Fox, but to Tails’ chagrin, he has been forbidden by Sally to put any oil in it. As tails stews over this, an oil soaked bird plops up on shore, saying Robotnik (yeah, remember that name? It’s been awhile since he was called that) has a henchmen building an undersea Roboticizer. Using the oil, Tails takes the Sea Fox on it’s maiden voyage, to beat Robotnik’s Octobot. It’s short, only five pages, and filled with the usual early day laughs.

The next story is the two part Growing Pains, published in Sonic the Hedgehog #28-29, again, already published in the Archives (#7, to be precise). Following the events of the main story of that issue, where Sonic got amnesia and Robotnik convinced him the Freedom Fighters were his enemy, an angry Tails takes the Sea Fox out to a deserted island, where we’re introduced to Fiona Fox... kind of. It’s a duplicate. I still haven’t read the issue where she’s really introduced, so I can’t comment on it, but considering how the real Fiona turns out makes this story tragic.

There’s not much to say about this story either, but I’m a little off-put on how Tails survived that exploding Roboticizer. Robotnik has ask on his face, but Tails looks relatively unharmed, despite being in the blasted thing. Oh well, it children’s comic logic, I guess, but even as a kid I noticed stuff like this.

Now we get to the real meat of this collection, the Tails miniseries. This one hasn’t been published, and it’s the first time I’ve read it. This was written at a time when the comic was drifting between serious and funny, not sure where it wanted to be. The Sally miniseries that predates this was pretty serious, but this one’s pretty goofy.

Robotnik does the whole ‘You Have Failed Me’ thing, and even mentions his “good friend Darth” while doing it, and there’s more of the thousands of Freedom Fighters that popped up everywhere in those days. I hated when these guys showed in the more recent comics because they were a bunch of new characters that I didn’t know on top of the thousands of Echidnas Penders made.

Part one is Tails discovering Robotnik’s blimp, only to be shot down and end up in a rematch with Octobot, which he ends up losing. He’s saved by the Forty Fathom Freedom Fighters, who don’t show up after this until the very end.

Part Two opens with a very embellished retelling from Tails. Here, the story kind of repeats. Tails gets into a fight with forces sent by Crocbot, Robotnik’s underboss, only to be saved by the Downunda Freedom Fighters. The blimp arrives, Crocbot plans to steal Robotnik’s resources, and Tails meets Altair, the first of many Knuckles recolors.

Part Three has Altair tell Tails of a prophecy that I think he fulfilled in an earlier Sonic Select, I don’t know, and goes on to defeat Crocbot with the help of the Downunda Freedom Fighters. Big surprise, they win and Tails decides to go home.

Besides setting up his role for a later story, Tails is actually not much use in the main story, and that’s the point. In the end, Sally and the others were right to keep him out of battle, he’s young and needs more direction. I like this, though considering later stories centered around Sonic combatting this very thing... eh.

The covers for the Tails series are misleading. They make it look like it’s going to be serious, but it ends up being more comical. Crocbot actually looks menacing rather than silly. The silly tone doesn’t mesh well with the mysterious elements of Althair’s prophecy, but it’s serviceable enough.

The final story is The Chosen One, a two-part story told in the back pages of Sonic the Hedgehog #249-250. It’s pretty simple; Zonic pulls Tails and Sonic into his zone to fight Mammoth Mogul, with several other Tails from different worlds. So, it’s a rehash of the fight with RoboRobotnik from early in the comic’s run. It’s... okay.

Yeah, this was a pretty “eh” collection. Nothing really stood out, and considering how long these thing take to get out, it’s a real disappointment. The next Archives isn’t due out until January, so the waiting begins anew.

Rating: 6/10

Wheel of Time: The Eye of the World

I'm actually midway through the sixth book in The Wheel of Time as I'm typing this. So why am I reviewing this book? The answer is simple: because as much as I love this series, it's long, it's convoluted, and I tend to miss a lot of things on my first read through. Jordan has his problems in writing, as many as he has strengths, and it necessitated a refresher to his stories.

For the uninformed, The Wheel of Time is infamous for its length. Fifteen book, eleven thousand pages, and 17.5 days of audiobook tracks. It's a commitment.

The prologue was perfect for a book like this. It's short (for a chapter in these books) and it does what it's supposed to do. The tragedy of Lews Therin ends up driving a good deal of the story, of which I approve of.

Getting into the actual story, it starts slow. It takes nearly five chapters for the characters to leave the Two Rivers, but I approve of this. It gives the tiny village of Edmunds Field a sense of coziness and familiarity. In the first chapter we meet our protagonist, Rand al'Thor, his friend Mat Cauthon, Rand's father Tam, the Congars and the Coplins, the mayor Bran, and Cenn Buie the thatcher. The second chapter introduces Ewin Finnegar, Master Luhaun the blacksmith, and the strangers Moiraine and Lan. The third chapter introduces us to our final protagonist, Perrin Aybara, Rand's starting love interest Egwene, the town Wisdom Nynaeve, and the peddler Padan Fain. As you see, there's a lot set up here, and all these characters are clearly defined, both by their personality and their roles in their community. This makes the Two Rivers seem like an actual close knit town, so you really feel bad when, in chapter five, trollocs attack Rand's peaceful farmhouse, when he arrives in the village only to find ir razed, and when Rand and his friends have to leave.

Listening to this, I'm beginning to realize just how good Jordan is at subtle foreshadowing. There were times when something significant happened that I thought little of, like the Myrddraal finding the group at the Stag & Lion after Rand ran into Padan Fain, or the strange sensation Rand feels when he's trying to will Bella to run faster. Even Mat's breakdown I was entirely passing off as mere nerves, even after finding out he took the dagger from Shadar Logoth.

In hindsight, this seems like an odd book out. Here, the characters are unknowns. By the end of the next book, the three boys are either lords or on their way to becoming them, leading armies and the like. It makes it kind of odd to reread this.

I've got to say, I'm waiting for the comic adaptation to get to the Ways. I'll bet they look cool.

Of course, if I'm going to talk about this, I think I need to talk about Jordan's gender politics. I felt like every adult male character in this book was my dad, telling a slightly chauvinistic joke when they were talking about a woman. It actually gets worse in later books, believe it or not. I wasn't really distracted by it yet.

There are a few hiccups in the book. There’s one scene that’s repeated twice, and I really don’t get it.

This book is a lot of exposition. Nearly every culture gets introduced, as does a lot of history. You need to look at this series as a whole, really. The big picture.

I guess I'll spend the rest of the review talking about the characters, and my thoughts on them.

Rand: I'm glad they avoided the "arrogant, headstrong youth looking for adventure" archetype I see in a lot of stories like this. No, Rand acting stupid isn't until the next book. Here, his mistakes seem like the kind of thing anyone being put in danger for the first time might do. He's an everyman, but not a blank slate.

Mat: Mat bugged the hell out of me in this book. After finding out about the dagger, I thought better of him, but I didn't start liking him until the third book. I was a bit surprised he wasn't just comic relief here.

Perrin: I think Perrin is someone we'd all like to be like: cool, collected, and not going about doing really stupid things like Mat and sometimes Rand does. I liked him probably the best out of the trio, mostly because I wished I could take things in stride as he can.

Egwene: ...Eh, there's really not much I have to say about her. In this book, at least, I had trouble seeing her as anything more than a love interest to Rand, at least in the first third. When the group gets separated and she ends up with Perrin, I was surprised. She doesn't grow out of this role until later.

Nyneave: I'll just say it: Nyneave annoys the hell out of me. Her attitude is the number one example of Jordan's skewed gender politics. I never really bought her relationship with Lan, even after looking out for it. In fact, this one book contains the only moment I've liked her so far, when she confronts Rand at the Stag & Lion.

Moiraine: Moiraine, in this book, is pretty flat. She's your typical old mentor, except she's a young (looking) woman. But as I result, I didn't hate the Aes Sedai until later (about book three).

Lan: Again, pretty flat here, barring his relationship (or lack thereof) with Nyneave. We don't even learn why he's serving Moiraine until another book, so... eh.

Thom: This guy's one of my favorite characters. He manages to be a second mentor, only with more playfulness about him. He looks after the three boys, even though he wants nothing to do with Aes Sedai. I don't think that I bought that he was dead, but maybe that's because I saw him listed as a major character in the fandom and this was the first book.

Lolial: Another favorite. I guess I have a soft spot for huge, gently giants. Even though he's mostly an observer in this book.

Whitecloaks: Jordan has successfully gotten me to hate a whole group within one scene, and it only got worse later. It's pretty clear that Jordan didn't think too highly of fundamentalist Christians.

The Tinkers: I’m wondering what commentary Jordan was trying to put in here. Are the Tinkers wise or foolish? Eh...

No rating, because you really need to read the whole series.

Kick-A** 2

Note: I try to avoid cursing in my reviews. In this one, however, it’s impossible to. You've been warned.

So, Tuesday a friend of mine was in town, and we decided to see a movie. The only one we could agree on was Kick-Ass 2, so here’s my thoughts.

I saw the first movie in theaters as well, and without getting too much into it, I thought it was solid. It isn’t in my top one hundred, but good nonetheless.

This film picks up two years later. Mindy has been skipping school to fight crime as Hit Girl. Dave, sick of doing nothing, decides to don the costume again and asks her to train him. Then, we get a reversal. Marcus discovers Mindy’s secret and puts a stop to it, and Mindy finds herself wondering if a normal life would be better. Dave, meanwhile, discovers a team of superheroes he inspired, and joins up. Meanwhile, Chris D’Amico accidentally kills his mother, who has been keeping him safe at home since the last movie, and is free to pursue his vendetta on Kick-Ass. Donning his mother’s bondage gear, he becomes The Motherfucker, the first super villain, and proceeds to build his own team.

I was wondering what message this film was trying to send in regards to Mindy. The first movie pretty much made it clear that Big Daddy was screwing her over by forcing her to fight crime, but here they portray it as a good thing. Everything else is pretty consistent, though. It shows why superheroes wouldn’t work in the real world, though it seems to hint at a sequel with Dave still being Kick-Ass anyway.

Like the first film, action and comedy mix, though you need a pretty dark sense of humor to laugh at a lot of it, like a scene where Chris tries to rape one of Dave’s allies, only to be unable to get it up, or Mindy getting revenge on some bullies with a device that makes them vomit and defecate. It’s not for everyone, so I have a hard time recommending it.

Katie is pretty much written out via a really cringe worthy scene where everyone thinks Dave and Mindy have been getting romantic. Then, they hit at a real romance between the two. This is a shame, because earlier in the movie there was a scene where Dave comforted Mindy, and it worked as a brother-sister moment. I liked Katie in the first movie, so the romance here seemed pointless.

Chris is an appealing villain. Like the first movie, he does horrible things, but there’s a human quality to him. After his mother’s death, his bodyguard Javier steps up as a father figure, giving advice and encouraging him in his quest for revenge. It’s heartwarming, in a weird way.

Speaking of which, the relationships in this movie work. Dave and Mindy, Chris and Javier, and Dave and his dad all work so well. This movie knew when to slow down and let the characters breathe.

The violence is back in full force. There’s nothing horror movie level, but still bad for anyone with a squeamish stomach. Blood and over the top fatalities abound. The action is good, especially in the final battle. Hit Girl is every bit as awesome as she ever was. The scene at the end where she fights Mother Russia is a highlight.

I’m passing on rating this movie, but I enjoyed it, and I think I’ll see Kick-Ass 3.

Sonic & Mega Man: September 2013

Yeah, I'm a fan of both Mega Man and Sonic, so the Archie comics are always on my "To Read" list. I'll be covering them every month.

Sonic the Hedgehog #252

“A New Lease On Life”

Well, we'll start with the newest issue of Sonic the Hedgehog, and here is the major game changer. Anyone who's been following the news on the comic knows about the Penders lawsuit, and this one is where it hits the fan. None of Penders's characters exist anymore, retconned out of existence thanks to Worlds Collide. I knew it would happen, but I was kind of hoping they would still continue the storyline. Sadly not.

Nagus is no longer in Geoffrey's body, and he just ditches the kingdom, though he seems to be back to suffering near insanity. Since Robo-Robotnik was technically a Penders character, he's been merged with the original Robotnik. I hope they do something similar with Scourge/Evil Sonic, since he’s the only Penders created character I care about. Sally is no longer roboticized, making the whole Silver plotline an entire waste of time. King Max is healthy again. Silver is apparently on speaking terms with the rest of the cast. And Sonic and Tails re-enter fighting the Tails Doll.

I'm not saying much now, since the problem with a comic is you have to wait to see where it's going, but this doesn't bode well. It essentially nullifies the last two years and makes it pointless (well, four years... that’s how long ago Silver came announcing a traitor).. I guess there's nothing for it, but that doesn't mean I have to like it. Maybe this is for the best, we'll see.

And Sally's redesign looked weird to me. But I'll get used to it.

Sonic Universe #56

“Pirate Plunder Panic Part 2”

I was looking forward to this. Blaze is reunited with Amy and Cream, Bean and Bark return as antagonists, and the Big Bad is a Metal Sonic remade into Captain Metal. Seeing these characters made me think of the laughs in the “Treasure Team Tango” arc, but this one aims more for drama.

So far Captain Metal hasn't really made an impression on me as a villain. We find out his origin a bit more here, but right now he’s your typical power hungry villain, with a pirate motif. There is a bit of sadism to him, telling his minion to wait and drop Blaze and Amy just as they get free There’s the revelation that he’s found and rebuilt the Wily Egg, but we’ll have to wait and see there.

Bean and Bark are not as hilarious here as they were the last time I saw them, but maybe that’s because they don’t really get a chance to shine here. At the end, they double cross Metal for the Sol Emerald, leading to some possibilities for humor. I got a better feel that they were villains here than before, where Bean seemed to just be an idiot and Bark his silently suffering caretaker.

Mega Man #29

“The Curse of Ra Moon: Part One: Bad Moon Rising”

A year and four months into the comic, we’re finally getting around to Mega Man 3, and combining it with the Japan-only Super Adventure Rockman to boot. I think this was a good move. I love this comic, but when they directly adapted the first two games, everything went by too quick. This had several issues of lead in, letting the pacing be better.

There’s a feeling of hopelessness here. Ra Moon has deactivated all the world’s electronics, and society’s falling apart. I do not think this is too far fetched. Whenever my internet goes out, I find myself at a loss on how to do things, so I can buy society getting this dependent, if they’re not already.

Proto Man... I’m wondering exactly what’s going to happen with him. World’s Collide seems to hint he and Dr. Light never fully reconcile, even after Mega Man 10. I’m worried as to how paranoid he has to be not to trust Dr. Light after having everything explained to him. Still, he’s already having doubts about Wily. I’m wondering if it’s here or Mega Man 4 he truly switches sides.

Once again, the other Robot Masters act as Mega Man’s back up, this time Cuts Man, Guts Man, and Bomb Man. A wise move, not using all six. And Plant Man appears three games ahead of schedule, but it’s just a cameo, unfortunately. I’m worried that there are two sets of Robot Masters that Mega Man has to deal with, as I don’t want the fights going by too quick... or maybe this will lead into the true Mega Man 3 adaptation.

Wily’s seems to be slipping in sanity, an interesting subplot. Ra Thor looks a lot like Bass, and for a moment I thought he was, until I checked and saw he was a SAR character. I love how Ian digs deep into the Mega Man lore for this comic.

All in all, looking good, and I’m looking forward to October.

Mega Man Collection 1

I love Mega Man, even though my backlog habits have stopped me from really getting out of the Classic and X series. So the American cartoon has been on my list for quite awhile. When I finally came across the first season at my local game shop, I threw down the money for it, even though I was truthfully not expecting much from it. This was an early nineties cartoon after all, and a licensed one at that, and these tend to be good for a few laughs, but not up to the standards of modern animation.

I vaguely remember seeing this on TV as a kid, but the only episode I remembered was the one where Mega Man and Snake Man switch bodies.

There are changes from the games, of course. Proto Man is unambiguously evil, since this was before Bass was invented and there needed to be an anti-Mega Man. Dr. Cossack doesn't seem to exist, all his robots are Wily’s, and Beat seems never to have been built. You really have to forgive these changes, there natural with an adaptation

The art style is pretty typical for action cartoons around this time, meaning it's passable, but it wasn't the kind of thing that could hold my attention back in the Nineties when I was eight. All of the characters have undergone the usual American Kirby treatment, their designs are more mature looking. Mega Man looks like a teenager than a child, as does Roll. I guess I can't blame this decision, and honestly it doesn't bother me.

You'll all be pleased to know the characters make this transition well. The main ones, at least. They all look fine, with maybe one or two nitpicky things that I hardly think is worth bringing up. The only one I really went "Huh?" at was Eddie, but apart from being green he doesn't look that different, and he showed up so little I didn't care.

The Robot Masters, too, looks pretty good. Most only show up in one episode (more on that in a minute) but are designed well. Any discrepancies you'd likely need the game art to really notice. (Pop Quiz: which is more pathetic: people who would whine about small redesigns, the fact that I had the Robot Master Field Guide next to me to check for changes, or the fact that I own the guide at all?) Only two really stood out to me. First, Air Man. I mean, seriously, look at him compared to his game art.

Seriously, what? I think they were going for a hardcore design, but even not comparing him to the game art he looks stupid. But he got off easy compared to Toad Man.

I mean, really. Upon reflection, it's not that different, but he looks so stupid and out of place compared to the other characters. Then again, whenever I even hear his name I think of the Bob and George version of him where he's the loser Cossack Bot that no one liked.

Also, I love how they had to give Wood Man a new weapon because his game weapon is useless.

So anyway, onto the series itself. It's filled with the usual cliche plots: an episode where Mega Man shrinks, and episode where Mega Man swaps bodies with an enemy, the most pathetic Paper Thin Disguises working (seriously, see that screenshot to the right? Seeing it bigger makes it even more obvious), and, as per usual for Merchandise Driven shows, boatloads of characters that only show up once. In this case, however, the one episode characters were usually Robot Masters, which I already knew from the games, so it wasn't so bad.

The plots were usually well written, containing no stupidity until the very end, with the last two episodes. Seriously, in Future Shock, Mega Man had time to send Dr. Light one minute into the future, but not enough to just pull him out of the way? And Dr. Light was blown clear but no one saw? And in The Strange Island of Dr. Wily, I’m pretty sure radiation doesn’t work that way. Then again, I could just be stupid. But even with these, I can forgive the rest, especially Future Shock, which was a great, if somewhat badly paced, episode.

This didn't seem to fall into any truly tight formula, though there was a hint of that. Dr. Wily causes trouble with Proto Man, Cut Man, Guts Man, and the fourth (and sometimes fifth and sixth) Robot Master of the week, Mega Man and company take care of it, everything turns out okay. There still is enough variety that I can forgive this. There seemed to be this running theme in three episodes where the group met someone who seemed nice, only for him to turn out to be a robot made by Wily, or working for Wily, or Wily himself. I worried this would become a thing, but luckily not.

You might notice I’ve mostly said negative things about this series. This doesn't mean I think the series is bad, just that I have very little to say about it. It’s passable, but I don’t think I can give a recommendation unless you’re a hardcore Mega Man fan like I am.

Final Score: 7/10